Snacks

This week's Snacks come from Ethan Ramos: Wrestled at the University of North Carolina, where he was a 4X NCAA National Qualifier, 2X ACC Champion, NCAA All-American, and 5X All-ACC Honor Roll member. In freestyle at the senior level, he competes for Puerto Rico and is a Pan-American Silver and Bronze Medalist, 4X Senior World Team member, placed as high as 5th at the World Championships, and was a 2024 Olympian. He is currently an assistant coach at Duke University and continues to compete at the senior level.

Below are some excerpts from our conversation, along with key takeaways and tips that can be applied to improve yourself as a Coach, Athlete, or wrestling Parent.

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Origin Story Tip: Allow big visions to take root early. Even before winning consistently, he imagined competing on the Olympic stage. That kind of long-term vision—paired with steady growth, learning technique, and staying committed—shows how an early dream can become reality. From youth losses to the 2024 Olympics, it’s proof that setting your sights high can guide the entire journey.

"I believe I was around seven years old when I started. This was in New Jersey, so they had the rec. leagues and things like that.

My dad had wrestled a little bit in high school. He did JV more so. He liked it, but he didn’t get super into it. His brother was a little better with it.

At the time, I had an older cousin who started wrestling. I think it reminded my dad, and he was like, “All right, well, let’s get him into wrestling.” He started getting us into a lot of sports. We did wrestling, T-ball, flag football at the time, and then football.

We tried a lot of different sports. When we started, I feel like I liked it, but it was kind of like you’re just there and having fun with exercises. I was into exercising.

My mom would wake up early, and I’d wake up and do sit-ups by her while she was making breakfast. She got me into exercising a little bit, and then I got more into it. I don’t remember exactly how into wrestling specifically I was.

I remember being a lot more aggressive than most kids. At first I wasn’t good at it. I was getting pinned a lot and kept getting caught with headlocks when I was very little.

Then somebody taught me at a tournament how to stop getting caught with those, and I started winning matches. I think it was seventh grade or maybe eighth grade when I decided, “This year I’m going to really try to apply myself and focus on what they’re teaching—technique.”

Before that, I was really good at doing bear crawls. I would just use my aggression and athleticism to bear crawl on the mat and then tackle kids, and it would work. That year I was still transitioning out of that, but I started learning more technique...

I remember being pretty young when I said, “I want to be an Olympic champ.” I feel like it was probably in middle school at some point. Earlier than that, I was driven to go to college and get a full-ride scholarship... I can’t remember exactly the time, but I felt like I was really invested in football as well.

By the time I got into high school, what I realized was I didn’t know how to get noticed with football in a school like mine. We were a small Group One, and I don’t think they were recording me. I wasn’t recording either, and I didn’t even know if I did record, who would I send it to?

How do you even get noticed? With wrestling, it was real simple: if I win the state championship, I’m going to get noticed, I’m going to get a full ride. That’s not always true, but that was the mindset I had with it.

So I was like, “I’m going to try my best in football and track, but with wrestling, I’m going to make sure I’m doing it all year round.” I wasn’t doing it every day all year round—I was just doing two days a week in the off-season and some tournaments."

Parent Tip: Help kids discover what they’re good at and nurture it. A parent’s role isn’t to be the coach—it’s to provide opportunities, pay attention to their strengths, and give them space to grow. And when fitness and healthy habits are introduced early, kids often learn to love that process for life.

"I don’t really know how it would have been for me had my parents been super involved to the point where they were trying to coach me all the time. They were involved, but they weren’t putting in all their input or training me directly. I don’t know if that would have helped more or hindered me, but what I felt they did well was this:

On my mom’s side, she got me really interested in exercise early on and interested in health. We didn’t always eat the healthiest things, but a lot of times she was juicing vegetables and fruits and learning about it. She would explain the benefits she was feeling in her body. She made those juices for us in the morning, and we drank them.

I believe she taught me more about exercise, too. I got into it, and I would work out next to her. That kind of got me started at an early age. When it came to my dad, he was really focused on getting us into sports and finding what we were good at, then supporting us in that.

He wasn’t heavy with feedback. He gave some, and if I felt it was helpful, I took it. If not, I just let it go. He was trying to see what we were doing better and emphasize that. It was me and my brother, and he took us to clubs and tournaments. Both my parents took us to clubs, but he was more involved with tournaments and practices.

They were really good at supporting and making sure we were going to competitions and testing ourselves. I was at a club that was doing well. I was getting beat up there by a really tough kid, but I thought it was good anyway. My dad felt like they were showing favoritism, so he took us out and brought us to another club.

That ended up being a good switch. It wasn’t about going against coaches—it was about looking out for our best interests, taking us to competitions, supporting us, and even supporting us with meals. They did good with that."

Coaching Tip: Consistency matters more than complexity. Athletes can thrive when coaches provide a stable environment, keep the fundamentals clear, and give them quality training partners. Instead of constantly trying to reshape someone’s style, notice their natural strengths and build on them. Supporting who they are as a wrestler helps them grow with confidence while still refining their technique.

"I felt like my High School coaches kept it basic. I’m very coachable, so if you take time with me, pay attention to what I’m doing, and fine-tune things, I’ll work at it. I felt like that’s what they were doing.

When they realized I was too far ahead of a lot of the guys in the room, they started bringing in volunteer coaches who had done well in high school, were bigger than me, and had more experience. That gave me higher-level looks because I was wrestling with coaches more often when that time came.

They didn’t put a lot of pressure on me either. Sometimes it would be like, “Hey, we need a pin here,” but it wasn’t like I felt this terrible pressure, like if I didn’t get the pin it was all on me. They always said, “Just try your best. Do what you need to do.” They tried to manage expectations for themselves more than for me.

They were good at providing a good spot to train and giving me good partners when I needed them. They stayed consistent, kept things basic, and weren’t throwing around a whole bunch of things. In college, I had good coaches, but the problem was I felt like my style was constantly being changed.

I had one coach I did really well with, then there was a coaching change. Then I had a whole new staff. Within that staff, I’d be working with one guy, then eventually another, and then another. Each one had a different take on what kind of wrestler I should be, and none of it really aligned with what I wanted to be.

At that time, it wasn’t focused on who I was or what I wanted—it was more about what they thought of me, and then it kept switching. So the consistency I had before was really helpful, and just letting me be me.

Now, I haven’t had consistent coaching for most of my senior-level time. I’ll take advice wherever I can get it. Right now, working with UNC has been good. Vincenzo and Enoch have been really good.

They give you positions, give you some technique, and tell you to work those into your style. Then they’ll notice things you’re already strong at and encourage you to focus on them. It doesn’t feel like I’m being changed so much. It’s more like, “Hey, you’re really good in this—let’s work it."

Athlete Tip: #1: What you do when no one is watching matters most. Train hard on your own, stay disciplined, and be coachable—otherwise you’ll end up getting in your own way. #2: Be process-driven, not results-driven. Stay grateful for the opportunity to wrestle, give everything you have, and trust that consistent effort will carry you closer to your goals—win or lose.

"I'll give a two-part answer. One is what helped me throughout my career, and the other is something I wish I knew that I’ve been really trying to work on now.

The first one has been said a lot, but I think it’s very true: what you do when no one’s looking truly matters. Like I said before, I didn’t need a lot of external motivation. If anything, I needed more people to get out of my way so I could train the way I felt I needed to.

But I was open to being coached and guided along the way. So number one is work hard when no one’s watching and be very coachable. If you’re not coachable, you’ll get in your own way for sure.

The other part I’m trying to work on now is being more process-oriented than results-oriented. Be grateful for the opportunity to wrestle. Be grateful that you have a functioning body to even be able to do it, because there are a lot of people that don’t.

Then do your best with what you’ve been given. At the end of the day, God has given us all abilities, and He wants us to use them to glorify Him. It’s not just about going through the motions—He wants a return on investment as well.

So if you put in the hard work, I think you’re going to get to where you want to go or at least get pretty close. At the end of the day, you’ll be happier with how you got there because of the effort you put in, the work you did, and the kind of example you were to other people.

If you’re only focused on the results, you’ll miss that. But if you give everything you have, you can be proud of yourself with the results you do get—whether it’s a win or a loss. You’ll know you gave it your all, versus being too tight, unable to let go, and losing because of that."

Negative Impact Tip: Focusing only on performance and ignoring the athlete’s mental and emotional well-being can do long-term damage. Kids can face heightened pressures from comparison and social media, and if parents or coaches only emphasize wins and losses, they risk tying a child’s self-worth to results. That pressure can lead to anxiety, burnout, and a negative relationship with the sport.

"Yeah, I think it’s a tough one for me because I’m not around the youth leagues as much. When I’m coaching, I’m very focused on what’s going on in that sphere, and sometimes it’s hard to look outside of it. But what comes to mind is how culture has been with youth these past years—the whole mental health thing.

Kids deal with a lot of mental health issues now, more than it seems they used to, compounded by social media and the problem of comparison. One thing is reminding kids of who they are as people and how their worth isn’t tied to how they’re doing as athletes. Encourage them to try their best, give them freedom in that, and coach them on mentality—not just the physical part.

That’s for parents as well. If you’re more focused on how your kids perform than how they feel after a loss, you may need to reevaluate what kind of investment you’re making. You should be asking: what kind of effort did they give? Are they having fun with it? If not, why? Have those discussions with them. Ask how they felt out there and if they gave their all.

Make it a conversation versus saying, “I saw this, and I’m upset.” Let the kid lead the conversation. If they’re slacking in a match, hold them accountable—don’t let laziness slide. But don’t tie performance to their worth. The focus should always be on giving their best at all times. If they lose, it doesn’t matter. Losses happen. What matters is trying, learning, and getting better."

Wrestling Growth Tip: Wrestling grows at the Senior level when athletes see a future in it. Without financial support, exposure, and investment, many talented wrestlers leave the sport early. New leagues and stronger media coverage can help keep top talent competing and inspire the next generation. Creating a system where athletes are paid after every Senior-level tournament not only encourages more competition but also ensures talent stays within the sport.

"Yeah, I've asked myself this question a lot. It's hard, but I feel like a lot of it is investment and opportunity, and then just showing people that there's a future in it. Or it's also showing the future that there currently is right now.

I train a guy that does jiu-jitsu, and whenever he goes to a tournament, they’re paying for those tournaments. If he wins, he's getting money for it. But for wrestling, I've only been to a couple of tournaments—the World Championships, the Olympics, and one ranking series—where I was able to make money.

I feel like there’s just not enough opportunity to make money. So you have a lot of people who are really good, or could get a lot better, but end up going another route because there’s no money here. At the end of the day, we need that to survive. It’s hard to chase your dream if you’re struggling as a wrestler and there’s no investment.

I feel like there has to be more of that. Those leagues that are coming up, like the RAF and the CLAW, I think those will help. We just have to build momentum around that...

Let’s put some investment and media coverage into it, because that’s what will help it grow. Look at the UFC or the NFL—at one time they were small, then they blew up huge. A lot of that was what they did in terms of media coverage and how they sold the story. Even WWE did that.

If we can get more coverage, more investment, and give more opportunities, then you keep more talent in the sport. That leads to better wrestling, and in turn, more enjoyment for everyone watching and participating."

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